Finding Motivation ...

• Today was one of those days.... where I had to dig deep to find motivation to do anything. I have been battlling depression for 4 years (well that's when I was diagnosed) I was on medication and seeing a therapist. And once I got rid of the toxic friend I got a lot better. There are still days, where I don't want to get out of bed. Today was one of those days. I started to read a story last night stayed up till past 1am to finish it and then was really tired in the morning. It was way past noon, when I finally decided to get my fat ass up and do something. So I worked and at 4 pm I had dug deep enough and felt guilty enough to go on a walk. I walked 2 miles with my dog and I am ok with that. :D The headache that I had is gone and I am feeling better. I also had a really healthy dinner, I made stir fry. I used Coconut Oil and I did not eat any rice. So I am good. I think maybe for dessert I have some fruit as I still have some calories left in my day.
• Yeah sometimes... you just have to dig deep to get the courage to workout and know it's for the best. YOU are responsible for your success, NOBODY else... Sometimes that is really hard and sometimes it's easier. It's never easy. Tonight is Supernatural on and I am going to bed after. So that tomorrow I feel good about hitting the gym for Combat at 9:30am. I want this so bad that I can taste it.
• I also went into my closet today and got my favorite pair of heels out. I want to wear them for my Photo OP with Jared. They are so cute and I want to get a dress to go with them preferrable in a size 12, if it's a 14 I am ok with that too. :D

Sam Winchester is my Personal Trainer...

What do you say? Well just look at these pictures...

Well anyway, since the new year I have been so busy with the Renaisannce faire, that I have not been able to get to the gym. But I am wearing my fit bit again and I have lost 4lb. since my last post. So not as bad as it could have been. So that is improvement. But I also walk about 14-18 Miles at the faire every weekend. I am also making better food choices of what I am bringing and don't gain weight during the weekend, which was always the hardest thing to do out there.

But why Sam Winchester you ask? Well I am getting a Photo OP with Jared aka Sam Winchester in September and I wanna look good and wear some damn heels and a dress. So yeah there is my motivation.

I joined the YMCA and I am so happy they have Body Combat. So today I went for the first time in over 3yrs. Well the good thing is, muscle memory is awesome, bad thing is I had to modify the jumping, first cause I am so out of shape and second my knee has been bothering me again. I got a brace that I am now wearing.

So I felt a bit intimidated when I got into the class room, cause needless to say, I was probably the only person in there that was 100lb. over weight. But I swallowed ducked my head and worked out. I had my wraps on which helps me to know where my fists are, cause yeah I hit myself before doing an upper cut. 

Once I was in the groove I felt like Sam and Dean Winchester ganking beasties left and right. I know I am going to be sore, so lots of water today. Tomorrow is another day of weights and cardio and Friday is combat again. Mondays are rest days cause frankly I am pooped after the weekend at Faire.