Day 9

Wow, what a week and a few days it has been.

I had some stress, but I managed to eat crap and cope instead with writing. I am actually quiet proud of that.

So things I have noticed so far.
I put on my pants this am and I didn't have to suck in to button and zip them. I noticed my t-shirt wasn't to tight around my arms.
I also noticed that it's been over a week that I took a nap in the afternoon. I am not nearly as tired as I used to be come 2pm.
I ate at a restaurant and I still lost weight. I am drinking a lot more water and hence my bathroom breaks are more often which equals more walking time. I think my kidney's are like WTF? Why do we suddenly have to work so hard? Cause I used to be able to go all day without drinking anything but 2 cups of coffee.
Going low carb is not as hard as I thought it would be.

I do see my goal and it's actually more of a pants size than a weight loss. I wanna be a 12 maybe even a 10 and I will be happy. Last time I did this in 8months I know I can do it again, I just don't know how long it will take.
The Body Combat program is 60 days, so we'll see.

The Road so far...

The past year has been a struggle, getting sick and injury, but 2015 is the year. I have motivation. There is a person that used to be in my life, that has given me the motivation to reach my goal. I also look like a beached Whale in my Jared Padalecki Photo Op. And I don't like it.
So I digress, here I am on Day 2 of Body Combat 90 Days.

I did Day 1 yesterday, had to modify some stuff, since it's been my first day in forever to actually workout. But I made it thru the 30mins and I felt awesome. I didn't feel like i had to take a nap. And after the workout I cried. Yup I cried, but not because I hurt, but I felt bad. How could I have let myself go? How could I have let this person, control my life? Why did I ever quit working at the gym? All these guilty feelings came up and I cried.
But then I stood up, shook them off and was proud, I made the first step. I finished Day 1.

I am about to do the Day 2 workout and then hit the Grocery Store. I have to get food to fuel the fight. I really like that Les Mills has Combat now to do at home. I missed doing it and I wanna stay with the good fight and eat right again.

I can do it. I don't want to go thru drastic measures like surgery. Cause after surgery you still have to change your whole lifestyle which you have to do anyways to loose weight.

I can do this... I've done it before. My goal is to get to this again:

I know it's a long road, but I will get there eventually. Thanks for sticking with me reading all this. I try my best this time around to blog consistently.

Burn out... (anoter a-ha moment)

No not from dieting or exercise... that's not it.

It's just these last 2.5 months have been taxing. I have not spend one weekend at home since December 29th. I spend it at the faire. It was fun and all, but I realized today I need a break.
I got home last weekend and I was just mentally drained. All week felt like a burden and the constant catching up is really tearing at me. So I decided to take this weekend off from everything I need a break to get my creative juices flowing again.
Well and I want to spend it with my mom who just flew in and is going to spend 8 weeks with us (yay no laundry)
I just had to get this off my chest. I just feel that I let people down but you know what I am not that person anymore, I don't have to be there every waking minute, cause if I am not I will be sternly talked to and told that I don't care. I am my own person, I need to take care of myself. Cause this past week I didn't go to the gym, I ate ok, but not as clean as I could./should have so there was no change on the scale which sucks. But it is what it is, this new piece of information is of great value to me for the future. I am saying NO, I can say NO and I will say NO.
Mental healthy is as much a part of this journey as the physical one. So here is to good mental health, Take care of youself.

Sam Winchester is my Personal Trainer...

What do you say? Well just look at these pictures...

Well anyway, since the new year I have been so busy with the Renaisannce faire, that I have not been able to get to the gym. But I am wearing my fit bit again and I have lost 4lb. since my last post. So not as bad as it could have been. So that is improvement. But I also walk about 14-18 Miles at the faire every weekend. I am also making better food choices of what I am bringing and don't gain weight during the weekend, which was always the hardest thing to do out there.

But why Sam Winchester you ask? Well I am getting a Photo OP with Jared aka Sam Winchester in September and I wanna look good and wear some damn heels and a dress. So yeah there is my motivation.

I joined the YMCA and I am so happy they have Body Combat. So today I went for the first time in over 3yrs. Well the good thing is, muscle memory is awesome, bad thing is I had to modify the jumping, first cause I am so out of shape and second my knee has been bothering me again. I got a brace that I am now wearing.

So I felt a bit intimidated when I got into the class room, cause needless to say, I was probably the only person in there that was 100lb. over weight. But I swallowed ducked my head and worked out. I had my wraps on which helps me to know where my fists are, cause yeah I hit myself before doing an upper cut. 

Once I was in the groove I felt like Sam and Dean Winchester ganking beasties left and right. I know I am going to be sore, so lots of water today. Tomorrow is another day of weights and cardio and Friday is combat again. Mondays are rest days cause frankly I am pooped after the weekend at Faire.