I failed on every single one of my goals this week. Why? I don't know. *sigh
I could blame it on the fact that Steve is gone for the week, but I don't think so. I think it had more to do with a flare up of mild depression. I was doing good Monday and Tuesday, Wednesday I found out that a former friend of mine decided to harp on me again. Which is nothing new, she does that with everybody that leaves her and of course it's all their fault and never hers. ( I am starting to wonder, cause by now I know at least 6 people in her live that happened to) Oh well I should not linger here. I realize that is a dark time especaily the last two years of our so called "Friendship", I alienated myself from other friends even from my family. Finally when my sister came to visit, she woke me up out of this indifferent coma I was in. My house was a catastrophe when she got here and we had a huge fight, but in the end we found each other again and I am so greatful for her. I had not been taking care of myself, I let myself gain the weight back cause I was to depressed to cook healthy or anything the like. So this here is part of my therapy. If I go off on a tangent, now you know why. I figured if I start to write down what is going on in my noggin, maybe I can get over whatever it is and take care of myself again.
But anyway, on Wednesday I sat at the computer crying, cause I was accused of copying Teablends on Adagio. Seriously? She had introduced me to Tea, yes I give her that. I really wanted to break all ties, so I am not going to order Tea from her blends. So I decided I want to try to create my own teas and yes one of them is close to one of hers. But fuck you bitch, you don't have a monopoly on Tea. Anyways that put me in a very emotional state.
Later I found this beautiful Video of Jensen Ackles one of my Favorite Actors at the moment, (he is fighting Hugh Jackman for number 1) singing this beautiful song and I am bawling again. (Video here).
I also miss my husband, he is in Houston for work and will be home tonight, but then I am leaving tomorrow for the Convention in Dallas. Then he is home for a week and then gone again for a week to San Francisco.
That will be the last time we have to do this for a while I hope.
And then comes the dreadded day of October 8th. When we close on the new house. Which I love the new house, but I really don't want to move. You must understand. I lived in Zurich for 22yrs then moved to Austin and that has been it for me. I love Austin, and I just got happy again I met so many great people this summer and got to know people better and now I have to leave. This just fucking sucks.
But it is a great Carreer move for hubby, I can do my etsy thing anywhere, and we are only 2hrs away from Austin. So yeah, it won't be to bad, but I can be a bit annoyed, pushing my bottom lip out.
Wow this post turned in to a huge rant about my life, how it sucks. LOL Well it doesn't I am very blessed, having my family, friends, we are in good hands. I am just frustrated how a small thing sent me into this hole, so maybe writing about it helped.
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